When the Photographer changes his style

So I write again. I have been busy shoot after shoot and book an xdeal model after model recently. Today, I write solely because I want a record of what is recently on my life and my photography as well. As it have been known, I have been more of a landscape photographer rather than a portrait/fashion photographer but this is no longer correct. In my first year of photography, there is so much that I see in nature that I have not seen in my life, so many things that seemed like it's my first time to see them again and capturing them passionately and so I became a shutterbug.

Things have changed now, I have travelled from Australia and back and in other parts of the country, I still took a lot of pictures but not quite getting what I wanted from them. The only photos that really stun me now or suites my tastes in my own craft is portraiture, fashion, concept and photojournalism. Is this really how it is to be an artist?



Perhaps, seeing the above photo brings out something deep inside you. A sense of emptiness, isolation and depression. Isn't it nice to capture something that brings out the deepest of the things words cannot express. It is only felt by the viewer. I am but a messenger, a photographer looking for a shot which brings out who he is and what he feels deep inside. But for the record, I am not at all depressed, perhaps, half empty if I may say. I am waiting for God, to fill me up from it.

Sometimes, I can't help but shed tears titling my photos like the below. Feeling the wind, makes me want to cry as I imagine, it's only in the wind now that I can feel my mom, the stars, the sky, the clouds and all those that I couldn't touch. I am even teary eyed writing this. I don't even know why I write this because I am sure my sister will read this and stir out some emotions from her as well. Don't you worry about me, I am fine and perhaps this is the artist in me.



There are times as well that I wish for love that I have never found or love that I have lost. I don't really have much words for it, but thank you Lord God for the photography as an expression.




I'm really not sure on what made me shift, I can only think that my not so distant past, where in I was shattered, broken and wounded in the sickness and demise of the person I have so much treasured and loved so much. Is it because, the expression of my emotions was not enough during those times? Is it because I held on to my tears for my mom, my sisters, my aunt and my father? Is it because I know life much more than I did before? Or is it just me being cheesy? As this word becomes popular in our country?

Whatever the reason may be, I will continue my quest for portraits here and there. I will continue to capture man's heart by his emotions through my own emotions.
Less of landscapes now, more of people in portraits.




Your third month of death Ma, is still a pain, I love you and I miss you so much.

Forever be missing you,
JayBoy as you fondly call me.